The Found Self https://thefoundself.com/ Writing on self-development and personal growth coaching en What a coaching conversation actually does https://thefoundself.com/essays/what-a-coaching-conversation-actually-does/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/what-a-coaching-conversation-actually-does/ Tue, 28 Jul 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Sessions The specific work a structured conversation performs on a problem you have already turned over privately for months. Goals that survive contact with your week https://thefoundself.com/essays/goals-that-survive-contact-with-your-week/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/goals-that-survive-contact-with-your-week/ Tue, 14 Jul 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Goals Why goals are set by the version of you with a free Sunday, and how to size one for the week that actually shows up. The honest audit https://thefoundself.com/essays/the-honest-audit/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/the-honest-audit/ Tue, 30 Jun 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Attention A two-week record of where time and attention actually go, and the discipline of not fixing anything while you take it. Habits are a design problem https://thefoundself.com/essays/habits-are-a-design-problem/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/habits-are-a-design-problem/ Tue, 16 Jun 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Habits Why repeated behaviour is governed more by friction, defaults and physical arrangement than by resolve. Motivation is the wrong lever https://thefoundself.com/essays/motivation-is-the-wrong-lever/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/motivation-is-the-wrong-lever/ Tue, 02 Jun 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Habits Motivation behaves like an output of doing the work rather than an input to it, and planning around it inverts the causation. How to be coached https://thefoundself.com/essays/how-to-be-coached/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/how-to-be-coached/ Tue, 19 May 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Sessions The reader's side of the conversation: bringing a live question, getting past the rehearsed answer, and using the gap between sessions. The inner critic has a job https://thefoundself.com/essays/the-inner-critic-has-a-job/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/the-inner-critic-has-a-job/ Tue, 05 May 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Attention Harsh self-talk usually carries real information wrapped in an unusable tone, and separating the two beats trying to silence it. What to do when you stall https://thefoundself.com/essays/what-to-do-when-you-stall/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/what-to-do-when-you-stall/ Tue, 21 Apr 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Goals Three distinct causes of a stall — an unclear next action, an unpriced cost and a goal you no longer want — each needing a different response. Choosing between two good lives https://thefoundself.com/essays/choosing-between-two-good-lives/ https://thefoundself.com/essays/choosing-between-two-good-lives/ Tue, 07 Apr 2026 09:00:00 +0000 Decisions Why comparing pros and cons fails on decisions where both options are genuinely good, and what replaces it.